Lying Down With Your Kids Before Bed May Not Actually Be A Bad Habit
October 16, 2019
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If you’re a parent, you’ve probably experienced a few nights where your child insists you lie down beside them as they fall asleep. This process usually involves a nighttime story, and then you pray to the sleep gods that they doze off sooner rather than later. Some parents absolutely refuse to lie down with their children before bed because they think it makes them needy and less independent. But today, we’re here to play the devil’s advocate.
For the parents who refuse to indulge their children in this way, I get it. You likely don’t want your children to become dependent on your presence in their bed in order for them to fall asleep. You might think that doing this won’t allow them to build the skills they need in order to be independent and have the ability to comfort themselves. You might also think that your kids will become too attached to you, making it hard for them to feel confident doing things by themselves.
On the contrary, studies have actually shown that the more attached your children are to you, the more confident and independent they become. The science behind this one is pretty simple. The more secure and loved a child feels, the more confident they will be to go out and do things in the world. They know that they have a strong security net to fall back into, and so they won’t be afraid to try things.
Another reason lying down with your kids before bed is beneficial? There’s going to come a day, not so far away from now, when they won’t need you in the same ways anymore. As they grow, and especially when they enter their teenage years, these intimate moments will become more and more spread out. As your children enter adulthood, they realize they need you more than ever — it’s a complete cycle! Anyways, cherish these moments while your children are still young. Take every chance you can get to cuddle them!
Every parent has a different style of raising their children, and there is no “right” or “wrong” way to do it. All I’m saying is that the next time someone scolds you for spoiling your child by lying down with them before bed, you’ll have a list of points to use for your rebuttal.
